Healthy Sense of Self
A healthy self-esteem does not come naturally. How many of us know someone with really low self-esteem or even have moments of our own? Now don’t go blaming your parents for any issues however we need to learn that if we want our children to have good self-esteem we need to help children learn a healthy sense of self.
Self-esteem is the way a person perceives themselves, their ability to think, feel and achieve in life. Children with high self-esteem typically are able to be independent, take responsibility, are able to handle negative and positive emotions (as both are normal experiences in life), take on challenges and help others. Children with low self-esteem tend to have avoidant social skills, blame others, put themselves down and are easily influenced (in school usually in a negative way).
A healthy sense of self is a huge factor in ones happiness in life. A good sense of self is a key factor in success in life. When children develop a good sense of self it aids them in the ups and downs life tends to throw at you. Children need to feel okay with their feelings and trust their feelings. People consistently acknowledge children’s Happy and good feelings but don’t talk about children’s other feelings. Ignoring feelings especially negative ones does not teach a child to be secure with all their feelings.
Parents and teachers need to have conversations about other feelings and let children verbalize how those feeling make them feel. A child who is in control and understands their feelings have higher senses of self. Children need to learn that I have this emotion because of XY or Z and it is ok.
Everyone needs to approach children and their feelings in a positive manner. How children are treated by parents, teachers and friends all factor into their self-perception. Children need to learn making mistakes is ok, being sad is ok, and being angry is ok. Children need to know you still love them and you need to be there to guide them through emotions so to encourage positive behavior and problem solving skills. Children need to accept mistakes and failures. Mistakes and failures are a normal part of life.
Parents and teachers need to be supportive and constructive when helping, guiding and modeling to a child how to deal with failure. Give children choices and suggestions on how to accomplish what they failed at nest time. People should never use negative or derogatory statement to a child- This lowers their self-worth and the child will be less likely to try again.
Parents can help in many ways build a strong sense of self in children. Families need to focus on child’s strengths and allow children to make their own decisions and choices s this is very empowering to a child. Parents need to help children accept that mistakes and failures are ok and normal and we learn from our experiences. Positive, loving and fair parenting (and teaching) always is a good start to building up children self-esteem and self-worth.
